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Boomerasking: Let’s Explore The Art Of Pretend Curiosity And Self-Glorification

Introducing The Conversational Trap We’ve All Fallen Into

Imagine you meet someone at a party, they ask you how your weekend was, and before you can say, “Oh, it was great, I went to—”, they cut you off to talk about their spontaneous trip to Paris, their latest stock market win, or how their kid is now a child prodigy at the age of four. Congratulations, you’ve just been boomerasked.

Boomerasking is the newly coined term for a self-centered conversational habit where someone asks a question not out of genuine curiosity but simply as a setup to talk about themselves. It’s that one-sided game of verbal chess where your response doesn’t actually matter—it’s just a polite segue for the boomerasker to deliver their personal TED Talk, completely unprompted.

If you’re thinking, “Wait, this sounds like my boss, my uncle, or that one friend who asks about my new job only to complain about theirs,” you’re not alone. The epidemic of boomerasking is alive and thriving, and it’s high time we dissected this social faux pas with a mix of scientific scrutiny and well-deserved sarcasm.

Boomerasking' Is a Big, Self-Centered Foul in Conversation

The Anatomy of a Boomerasker: What Drives This Conversational Crime?

Boomerasking isn’t just an annoying social habit—it’s an unholy mix of self-absorption, performance, and a lack of conversational awareness. According to a report by The Wall Street Journal, the tendency to boomerask often stems from a mix of:

  1. Ego and the Need for Validation: The modern world has us all fighting for attention, and for some, every conversation is a competition to prove they are more interesting, more successful, or simply more everything.
  2. Social Media Influence: Platforms like Instagram and LinkedIn have conditioned people to overshare. It’s the digital equivalent of boomerasking—why listen when you can broadcast?
  3. Lack of Emotional Intelligence: Some people genuinely believe they’re engaging in a two-way discussion when, in reality, they are hosting a monologue.
  4. Generational Factors: The name “boomerasking” suggests an association with Baby Boomers, but let’s be real—every generation has its culprits. Millennials and Gen Z are just as guilty, except they boomerask through DMs and voice notes.

Real-Life Examples: When Boomerasking Strikes

  1. The Workplace Boomerasker

Imagine you’re at a meeting, sipping your coffee, when a colleague asks, “So, how’s your latest project going?” 

You start responding, “Oh, it’s going well, we’re launching next week, and—” 

Boomerasker: “Yeah, that reminds me of when I single-handedly saved the company during Q4 2019.”

You sit there, nodding politely, as they relive their heroic past while your coffee gets cold.

  1. The Family Gathering Boomerasker

Your aunt asks, “How’s your new apartment?”

You begin, “Oh, I love it! It has a great view of—”

Aunt: “That reminds me! My first apartment had a view of the Eiffel Tower. Of course, I was in Paris back then… have I told you about the time I met a French diplomat?”

Goodbye, conversation. Hello, unsolicited nostalgia.

Boomerasking' Is a Big, Self-Centered Foul in Conversation

  1. The First Date Boomerasker

Potential soulmate: “So, tell me about your hobbies.”

You: “I love painting and hiking, actually just last weekend—”

Potential soulmate: “OMG, me too! I once climbed Everest! Well, almost. I did a virtual hike. Have you heard of the metaverse?”

Check, please.

The Science Behind Boomerasking: Are We All Guilty?

While it’s easy to label boomeraskers as self-absorbed, psychology suggests that most people have some level of conversational narcissism. A study published in PubMed explains that humans naturally steer conversations toward their own experiences because it makes them feel connected and validated.

However, the problem arises when this tendency morphs into an uncontrollable need to dominate conversations. The worst offenders don’t even realize they’re doing it—they believe they’re being engaging, relatable, and charismatic. Spoiler alert: They’re not.

A report suggests that people who consistently boomerask may have poor active listening skills, meaning they are so focused on what they’re going to say next that they don’t process the other person’s words at all.

How to Handle a Boomerasker Without Losing Your Sanity

If you find yourself frequently trapped in one-sided conversations, fear not—there are ways to escape without causing a social crisis.

  1. The Art of Redirection

Instead of letting the conversation become a self-absorbed circus, reclaim control by redirecting the focus back to you:

Boomerasker: “Oh, you just got back from a trip? That reminds me of when I backpacked through Europe in the ’80s.”

You: “That’s great! But tell me, have you ever been to a place with no WiFi for a week? That’s what happened to me in the Himalayas.”

Now you’re back in control.

  1. The Subtle Interruption

Sometimes, boomeraskers need a gentle but firm reminder that you exist.

Boomerasker: “Yeah, your new role sounds good, but when I was in corporate leadership…”

You: “Speaking of which, that actually reminds me—I had a great insight about my project today!”

Boomerasking them right back? Genius.

  1. The Exit Strategy

If all else fails, make your escape.

Boomerasker: “Oh wow, your pet just learned a new trick? That reminds me of the time I trained a wild horse in Mongolia—”

You: “Oh look, my drink is empty. Gotta refill!”

Disappear before they get to the second chapter of their autobiography.

The Fine Line: Is All Storytelling Boomerasking?

Not quite. Storytelling is an essential part of human connection, and sharing experiences is what makes conversations meaningful. The key difference? Balance.

  • A healthy conversation is reciprocal—you share, they share, and everyone listens.
  • Boomerasking, on the other hand, is one-way traffic, where the other person’s words serve only as a launching pad for your own anecdotes.

Boomerasking”: There's Finally A Name For This Self-Centered Conversational  Habit |

At The End: Can We Retire Boomerasking?

Boomerasking may not be a criminal offense, but it’s definitely a social misdemeanor. The good news? Awareness is the first step to change.

So, the next time you’re about to hijack a conversation with “That reminds me of when I…”, pause. Ask yourself: Am I actually engaging, or am I just waiting for my turn to talk?

Because let’s be honest—no one needs another monologue about your trip to Bali, your childhood trauma, or the time you met a celebrity in an elevator when they just asked about the weather.

Let’s all aim for better listening, fewer boomerasks, and more actual conversations.

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